Last weekend as we were enjoying a beautiful sunny day on our motorcycle, I noticed the storm cloud quickly approaching. It had to be the biggest thunder head I had ever seen. We attempted to skirt the edge of it, however, the paths ahead prevented our escape. As the rain and hail dampened our spirits we sought shelter beneath the trees. However, aspen trees fail to shelter us as our clothes underneath our jackets began to stick to our skin. My husband and I smiled at each other. What else could we do but wait.
When the downpour stopped I refused to get back on the bike to ride down the hill. It was far to terrifying for me I chose to walk down the muddy road which appeared to be much less dangerous. Sliding on my but in the mud seemed less harmful than falling down with an 800 pound bike. As I walked I saw the flash in the corner of my eye and proceeded to count only to get to one before the ear shattering crack. To say I flinched would be putting it mildly, I jumped out of my skin and into a fit of laughter. Grateful I didn’t get struck and in awe of the power of thunder. Nature doesn’t play games.
As we stood there staring at the mud soaked roads, I had the sensation of the all too familiar butterfly feeling in my stomach. My smile crept up from my stomach and I wanted to scream at the sky because of how much I felt alive. I also realized that since we started our road trip I hadn’t once thought about work or worried about the things I had when I was at home. I was grateful to be with my husband and happy to just be standing in the mud. Life has a way of preventing us from seeing what is right in front of us. We get so caught up in our world of money, stress, and whatever else it is that binds us and prevents us from just being.
The other day a person of perceived power told me I couldn’t do something. He said I did not have permission. He said the word no! I despise the word no and when someone tells me no my blood starts to boil and I feel twitch to rebel. However, I am an adult and so I took a few deep breaths and focused on why I was so mad. I don’t like to feel powerless and ever since we moved here I have felt like I have no power over my life. I try to go one way and God says no, you have to go this way. Patience has never been my forte and yet this year and a half I have had to learn to be patient no matter how frustrating it can be.
As we were riding I had been watching the thunderhead and was admiring its beauty. When we to to the edge I could feel the energy in the air and tasted excitement. After the storm I could still feel the electricity in the air and I felt rejuvenated. I took that home with me and I used it when this person said no to me. I took deep breaths and focused on what was important. My children, my husband, my family, my dog, they are what is important to me and they are what rejuvenate me and make me feel alive. Nothing else matters. In life we get so caught up in worrying about our jobs, bills, taxes, etc. that we forget what matters is the people in our lives that give us our purpose.
I just have to remember to take each moment and realize that if it is stressful it will pass, and if it is beautiful it will last longer when I breathe in and out slowly and savor each detail.